Wednesday, July 27, 2011

The voice of truth says do not be afraid

Today I was advised by the nurses to stay off the internet. I tried all afternoon yesterday to search baby sites for message boards looking for some sort of support. I feel guilty for being relieved that my baby is doing so well compared to all the other babies, but I think looking day by day, moment by moment, we forgot that there are so many things in the future we might have to worry about. I guess I wanted to find a baby who was born the same gestation as Gavin (27 weeks), who went thru exactly the same things and is now a healthy and happy toddler. But as the nurse said, moms of healthy babies aren't looking for support on message boards, they have no reason to. Will it inspire to me go back when Gavin is older and healthy and happy to offer my experience as support? Maybe, but I doubt it. Gavin truly has been healthy and strong. Not that it has been an easy road, and I know it's not over yet, but hearing others' stories has wrenched my heart and really shown me how truly blessed we have been. Gavin hasn't had a brain bleed, he didn't have an infection when we thought he might, he is gaining weight daily and his progress has been unbelievable! I might need reminding of this later when we have multiple doctor appointments or when the news isn't what we had hoped for as he grows, but it could have been so much worse. Anywhere along this journey things could have gone so wrong, but right now, we have a healthy, happy 31-weeker (as they call him in the nursery). I will continue to go day by day, moment by moment, celebrate his accomplishments, and take the bumps as they come.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

And he practically crawled out on his own!

Here he is, Gavin Richard Darcy. He was born June 28th at 4:03 pm, weighing 2 pounds 11 ounces, 15 1/2" tall. I woke up at 3am the Friday before to take my Procardia dose (to stop contractions) and my water broke. Back to the hospital we went, expecting a c-section within a few hours, but they actually wanted to wait until I went into labor to let Gavin cook as long as possible. With much arguing with doctors and questions from family, I continued to lose water and wait...and wait...but nothing was really happening besides becoming increasingly more uncomfortable. I'd had some mild contractions but nothing was changing. By Tuesday I was uncomfortable, irritable, and missed my family so much (so lucky that Rick got to stay in the hospital with me but he had to return to work if nothing was happening soon). I was fed up, and Gavin decided to start kicking me in the cervix, which hurt worse than any labor I had had with the other three boys! We insisted that the nurse call the OB, who didn't find it important because it wasn't actual "labor". A few HOURS later a technician came for an ultrasound, who found a tiny foot sticking out where it didn't belong! Off we were finally wisked off to have our baby, who is beautiful and doing well! He is 2 pounds 15 ounces as of today, and is waiting for a bed to open up in the step-down nursery. He is strong and fiesty, with a gorgeous head of golden brown hair. Although its been a rocky road, we are truly blessed to have this tiny miracle baby!